New Harry Potter Activity Book About Art of Spying
Banned from Hogwarts
by Rita Skeeter
Special Correspondent to the Leaky Prophet
In an unprecedented move, the Headmaster of Hogwarts, Zenophilia Tonks, has determined that the new Harry Potter and the Art of Spying Young Agent Edition shall be banned from Hogwarts for the duration of the 2017 school year.
“It is simply causing too much disruption,” Headmistress Tonks stated. “Students are reading the book and doing the activity pages, mazes, breaking codes, and such–to the determent of their studies. Some students are going so far as to put the book inside Transfigurations for Third Years during class. Poor Professor Windbagis simply can’t get the students to pay attention, even when she turns herself into a Siberian Tiger.”
Professor Windbagis confirmed this concern. “As much as we all love Harry Potter and learning all the spycraft lessons in the Young Agent Edition of the truly wonderful Harry Potter and the Art of Spying book, I simply have to get the students ready for their O.W.L.s, and that won’t happen with this new book lying about.”
Head Librarian Madam Pince was, as we would all surmise, furious about the decision.
“Banning books should never, never happen, especially one that does no real harm, such as the Potter Spying book. There are other ways of dealing with students reading in class or not getting their homework completed, but one should never, ever, ban a book!”
When asked about all the banned books that use Dark Magic, Madam Pince could only simper, “That is why we have a restricted section.”
Professor Longbottom — who as we all know participated in the final battle of Hogwarts and the person who killed the snake owned by He-Who-Used-Never-To-Be Named — understandably has great influence in the Wizarding world, and told this reporter that he considers banning the Potter Spy book as an attack against academic and intellectual freedom. “We fought against Voldemort to insure our freedoms,” said Professor Longbottom rather pedantically, “not to have them limited.”
The authors of the book, Lynn Boughey and Peter Earnest — frequent guest lectures at Hogwarts, particularly in Defense Against the Dark Arts classes — were not available for comment.
Get more Rita Skeeter articles, interviews, and moderator of Trump-Clinton Presidential debate at https://artofspying.net/category/blog/